To Be a Woman Is To Be Revolutionary

Photo by Martino Pietropoli on Unsplash

I have encountered many paradoxes in life and one of the many is being a woman. If you ask me to define a woman, I will look at you with pearl white blank eyes until you retreat into your shell, if you have one. How am I supposed to have an answer that should reflect who I am when I am searching for who I am?

Ever since I was a child, I was told about what a woman should be like. Respectful, patient, always tending to men and little boys who had all day to play football and tinker with self-made toys while I camped in the kitchen, keeping the fire burning. I was often reminded about how important the male species was and how amidst all in life, I had to put my life second to theirs. I had to shrink myself in order for this other alleged superior creature to bounce in its glory.

As I grew older, I allowed myself to question the status quo. I was not comfortable with the notion that I was second to or less than. If anything, I was much better at almost everything than the boys and men I was supposed to worship. I saw women who stayed in marriages with abusive alcoholic husbands who would occasionally be seen with different women in different villages and I remember wondering why they would punish themselves in this manner.

These questions led me to take a vow that no matter what happened in life, I would not allow myself to be disrespected just because I happened to be a woman. I was going to fight, tooth and nail, to be whoever I wanted to be, even if it went against what my society expected from me. What I had not prepared for was the reality of having to fight for my beliefs when people who knew me did not understand me. I was daring to change the rules without permission and happy is not the word to describe the reactions I got and still get to date.

Some people call me a rebel, others an activist all in hope that these words will kill the fighter within me. However, I embrace them wholeheartedly because these words describe exactly who I am, a young woman refusing to be imprisoned by senseless rules and through her rebellion, creates a blueprint for change, an alternative for other young girls. The young me chose to be the woman she had wanted to see, I am glad that she did because her spirit reminds me everyday that I can do anything.

So if you ask me today what it means to be a woman, I may not have an answer yet, but I can tell you one thing, to be a woman is to be revolutionary.

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